Who am I?

You know many of us are the person that other people have expected us to be. Not the people we were meant to be.

I spent the first years of my life trying to live up to my parents and their expectations for me which I never satisfied, my grandfather and his expectations for me which were totally different from theirs, and again which I never satisfied because of course that was not who I was. then a succession of boyfriends .. making sure that I followed their football teams, their ideologies. More importantly, racist views to political. Even the breed of dog I should prefer. I became a sheeple as it was easier. Enough punches and you’ll be anyone they want you to be.

And of course throughout all those years never living up to my own expectations, because I was living a lie. never even realising what my own expectations were.

When you live your life for other people you do not have time to discover how to live life for yourself.   You do not have time to discover what kind of life you want to live for yourself. You end up disliking yourself but not realising why. You may be hating the person you are. You may think you’re horrible . deserve everything you get when people are not satisfied with what you’re doing… but It’s just not true.

Don’t try to be what others want to mould you to be. Don’t try and live a lie. Always look inside yourself at what you want….and if the noise around you is too loud so that you cannot hear yourself, leave it for a while. Take some time out. Go somewhere where the only voice you can hear is your own.  if people are telling you constantly who and what to be they are controlling you.  That’s not love.

For it is your voice alone that matters in your own life. it is your own voice only that tells you who you are and how you want to be.

Live your own life not anyone else’s x

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